Update On Lesser Defendant, Wesley

Recently at church someone asked about ‘Wesley’, I always appreciate it when people let me know they read my posts and care about Marc’s legacy! Other friends ask about him too. This is why I love being a Christian …. cause we are a community that cares about others outside our sphere.

Sign on MAX train for Clackamas stop

The other day Wesley and I were in touch as I’d messaged him about some more places to eat, find clothes, hygiene items. Also, since I know about Lutheran churches fairly well and know they often have food pantry’s/meals I called several. One church secretary in SE Portland said they are open Tues – Fri if someone wanted to come by for a hot cup of coffee, use the restroom or simply wanted to ‘talk’! Sometimes that’s just what some people need in a crises … that daily interaction with someone who cares.

Next day or so I spoke with him over the phone and asked if he could go home, could someone call his parents? (I’d like it if someone called me about the whereabouts of my son.) What he said has haunted me for days! I know he looked up to his dad, but he told me after he turned 18 his parents gave up on him as he’s not their ‘real’ son!!  (he’s adopted)

I’ve been so upset for days after hearing him so matter of factly say that. I could feel the pain in his voice. To be abandoned by the ones who helped bring you into this world or raise you must be an unimaginable load to carry? I don’t know his family circumstances and I’m not putting his parents down, but there are alot of youth out there going thru trials like him. And it doesn’t matter how nice or honest you are, the devil is after our family life, so it sorta makes me mad!

Wesley WAS involved in a murder case. That taints you, people fear getting close as they don’t know what you’re capable of doing ….  even after they hear the details of the case. How do you recover when your parents desert you? It’s a bitter pill for me to swallow right now. He needs a place where he’s accepted but held accountable. It’s just hard to get him into a program as he’s been stolen from several times, beaten up, even in shelters, so he prefers to be by himself or with friends he knows.

I called a street minister last week who’s checking out some resources for him, he may be able to find Wesley a case manager. If he doesn’t get help soon, I don’t know how he can make it in this world? He has too much dignity, good sense to go into any drug, gang or sex ring. There are people out there who prey on those who are lost or in a seemingly hopeless situation, so I’m concerned for him. Having boundaries, some character strength is what gives me such hope for him!

I’m so glad he’s staying in a safer neighborhood, away from the riff-raff areas. He’s trying to protect himself. He’s dependent though, hooks up with male or female youth who he knows from FB, circles of friends, he’s liked by many. It’s great he can form bonds with people! But …. he’s forced to live by the goodness of others too much, he’s not taking his life in his own hands like he should. You can only go so far with that.

He’s desperately trying to find a place to fit in, belong to. God cares about these lost kids that people don’t see and so do I. They have worth, they can have a future and give back! That’s what I want for Wesley as he’s redeemable! Every time I meet with him I smile, we hug. He missed some of those early mentoring steps, but I don’t think it’s too late.

The last time I spoke with him I told him on the phone about some need of his, I told him ‘God is bigger than your problem, He’s bigger than this!’ He just stopped short, I felt he knew somehow it was true. I know Marc would want me to tell him that.

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